Thursday, January 1, 2026

Some basic principles of masculinity

From Twitter/X today, inspired by an excellent article by Justin Lee:

Posted by at

45 comments:

  1. AnonymousJanuary 1, 2026 at 3:22 PM

    Excellent list, there, Ed. Charlie Kirk was a good exemplar of those virtues. He strongly opposed Nick Fuentes and the groypers (the main subject of Justin Lee's original article) and inspired thousands to live a better life. His last book, Stop in the Name of God, is very good also--all about the benefits of keeping sabbath, whether done on a Saturday or a Sunday.

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    1. EXEJanuary 1, 2026 at 5:40 PM

      Really? The Saint Charlie Kirk narrative? The man didn't deserve to die, but the hagiography applied to a petty, intellectually-lightweight culture warrior whose primary contribution to the world was pushing the Overton Window further Rightward sickens me to my stomach.

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    2. AnonymousJanuary 1, 2026 at 7:00 PM

      EXE,
      What sickens you is that he succeeded in reversing the leftward trajectory that the Overton Window had moved. He had phenomenal courage. He learned from those with greater age and experience; he passed over 30 courses at Hillsdale College, he learned from the ancient, medieval, and modern thinkers. He was an evangelical Protestant with a Catholic wife and he learned from Jewish thinkers. His book on the sabbath emphasizes solutions, and also shows intellectual modesty. If J. D. Vance becomes the next President, as is likely, he will have Charlie Kirk to thank for it. Charlie accomplished a great deal and likely could outdebate either you or I easily.

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    3. AnonymousJanuary 1, 2026 at 10:29 PM

      This is the sort of unmanly behavior he's talking about in the tweet, btw. Others should take note, and not follow EXE's example of limp-wristed whinging.

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    4. EXEJanuary 2, 2026 at 8:48 AM

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gVHQCfjNoqg

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    5. AnonymousJanuary 2, 2026 at 2:12 PM

      "If I see a black pilot, I think 'I hope he's qualified'"- White supremacist Charlie Kirk.

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    6. KevinJanuary 3, 2026 at 6:03 AM

      That's not a white supremacist view. It's a basic understanding of how a quota of any sort will by necessity include lesser qualified individuals, because there is a smaller pool to choose from. That's why sports teams from smaller schools tend to be disadvantaged compared to larger schools - smaller talent pool, fewer options.

      Now, you can argue that Kirk was wrong about what DEI is, but saying that's a white supremacist view is ignorant, at best.

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  2. Duncan GrahamJanuary 1, 2026 at 3:23 PM

    Using 'etc' four times, 'at the very least', and 'and the like' is not the mark of a writer with a wide vocabulary and compact style.

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    1. Edward FeserJanuary 1, 2026 at 3:53 PM

      I'll add a further principle:

      8. Bear petty criticisms with patience and good humor. Etc. etc.

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    2. CosmoPlugJanuary 5, 2026 at 2:23 AM

      😂

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  3. EXEJanuary 1, 2026 at 5:42 PM

    Hmm. Advice on how to live from an essentialist. I'll pass. Wasted too much of my life already trying to practice what old men thought dead men thought would make me happy, only to find that it did no such thing.

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    1. Edward FeserJanuary 1, 2026 at 6:15 PM

      A pretty lame ad hominem. Most of what I said could be endorsed by someone whatever he thinks of essentialism.

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    2. Tim LambertJanuary 1, 2026 at 6:55 PM

      "Wasted too much of my life already trying to practice what old men thought dead men thought would make me happy"... There's your problem. Assuming you're not lying (which I would wager you are, and you're just taking the opportunity to make a rude comment)... assuming that.... you followed all of that advice in hopes it would make you happy? Not in order to be good. Not in order to cultivate something of a higher worth than "being happy". I'll grant you the validity of your rude comment, but it's your fault for treating the advice as being little more than a self help book.

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    3. bmillerJanuary 1, 2026 at 6:56 PM

      EXE,

      Didn't you recently post a comment that you regret the hostility you displayed in the past a this site? And this is you when you're not hostile?

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    4. AnonymousJanuary 1, 2026 at 8:22 PM

      What has made you happy, EXE?

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    5. EXEJanuary 2, 2026 at 9:23 AM

      Fine, Ed, I'll grant that it was an ad hom comment, but given that you were advancing a teaching rather than an argument I figured "I know from experience that this leads to misery instead of fulfillment" was a good enough response. I responded such because it reminded me of the type of doctrine that caused me years of unnecessary suffering. A more substantive criticism, then, might be this: how do you know that the standards of masculinity that you set forth truly reflect objective, basic truths about reality, as opposed to merely the subjective opinions of yourself and/or your culture? If another culture comes along and frames your attempt at dispassion as moral sloth, instead framing anger as righteous passion? How do you declare them wrong? It'd be one thing if you merely set these forth as suggestions based on your experience, but you portray them as truths, things known beyond the arena of subjectivity.

      Furthermore, this account presumes a singular, fixed nature for men, namely that at some basic level they have some set of attitudes, behaviors, and interests that unite them and/or are good for them, different from those common to all human beings qua human beings. What happens if a man tries to follow this and finds that what you describe is totally inaccurate as a description of himself? What if he finds that following your rules makes him miserable, inauthentic, and unfulfilled? Is he supposed to simply try harder, and double and triple down no matter the cost? It seems like your worldview in unable to account for the diversity of human existence - to take just one example, the experience of neurodivergent people.

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    6. OA PoliceJanuary 2, 2026 at 10:40 AM

      I agree with a fair few of your political queries, but how do you think you are even going to make those statements without pointing out defining characteristics/necessary properties? Or do you mean specifically essentialism about gender?

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    7. bmillerJanuary 2, 2026 at 12:13 PM

      So neurodivergent people will improve their lives by being uncivil, refuse to learn from experienced people, being crude in mixed company, complain unproductively about problems, let the vulnerable fend for themselves, become a drunk and bitterly resent everyone that doesn't see they are a genius.

      Since it seems you are living out your personal philosophy, is it making you happy?

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    8. Vini TadeoJanuary 2, 2026 at 12:26 PM

      @EXE

      Wow, that's just what a teenager having a tantrum would say!

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    9. EXEJanuary 2, 2026 at 5:03 PM

      Well, thanks to everyone for validating that I'm wasting my time here. Really, I'm the fool here, for not realizing it sooner.

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    10. bmillerJanuary 2, 2026 at 6:13 PM

      Really? Which others sites do post to where being a jerk doesn't waste your time?

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    11. AnonymousJanuary 3, 2026 at 11:35 AM

      Without trying to be uncivil, I agree with EXE that he is currently wasting his time here. He should leave for greener pastures.

      EXE, your root (intellectual) premises and your basic experience categories (as far as you can express them) don't cohere with those of other people here. Hence your discussions and comments simply slide skew-wise across the arguments made, and vice versa: you are virtually always talking at cross-purposes to everyone else, with so much of a lack of common definitions, common experiences, common thought-framework that almost nothing gets communicated other than your disgust.

      So I encourage you go elsewhere to discuss. Perhaps, in the fullness of time, you will have grown your experience set and your cognition frameworks, and expanded your intellectual tools, so that even if you still disagree with people at sites like this, you can at least DISCUSS things with them using mutually recognized words (and connotations of words) and comparable notions. Till then, it's just an exercise in frustrating futility, for you and for us.

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  4. TalmidJanuary 1, 2026 at 6:44 PM

    Interesting reading. 7 is being particularly challenging, but what one can do.

    I shall translate the list and share with a few friends.

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  5. AnonymousJanuary 1, 2026 at 7:41 PM

    Thanks Ed. Those principles can equally apply to women.

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  6. NormJanuary 1, 2026 at 9:18 PM

    Lovely points Prof...
    This means a lot to me.
    I mean to share it on my WhatsApp status, one point at time, each for a day!

    A quick question, Anthony on twitter made a quick point about not being arrogant or servile.

    Could you briefly elaborate on what behaviour would be considered servile, would it be excessive people pleasing or something like that.

    Although at the same time if one were to model the themselves on Christ, I would say it's better to err when in doubt on the side of being servile, the way in which Christ washed the feet of his disciples. So it's better to err on that side. It's more in keeping with masculinity to put oneself at the service of others

    But thank you again. These are great points.



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    1. NLRJanuary 2, 2026 at 4:56 AM

      Norm, as far as servile goes, I think a lot of it comes down to good faith. If someone makes a good faith request for help (and the goal is something genuinely good), then even if it is a humble or menial task it is worth helping them.

      But if someone is in bad faith and is asking others to do something, to vote a certain way, to believe something, to defer to a certain ideology, then no one is under any obligation to do this. Even if the person actually believes in it and is not being manipulative, being civil does not obligate anyone to respect things that are not worthy of it.

      Basically, it is about avoiding excessive deference, especially towards people acting in bad faith.

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  7. NormJanuary 1, 2026 at 9:43 PM

    "Now this is how the birth of Jesus Christ came about. When his mother Mary was betrothed to Joseph,* but before they lived together, she was found with child through the holy Spirit.
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    Joseph her husband, since he was a righteous man,* yet unwilling to expose her to shame, decided to divorce her quietly."

    A very relevant biblical passage as well in keeping with the season. If more men could emulate St Joseph's attitude towards bearing pain and suffering, the world would be a better place.

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  8. AnonymousJanuary 2, 2026 at 3:51 AM

    Far be it from me to complain about any of these Ed, but would a single one of them not be of benefit to young women?

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    1. AnonymousJanuary 3, 2026 at 11:54 AM

      They would all be applicable to all people, but not in equal measure:

      5. Look out for someone in your orbit who needs in some way to be protected or provided for...

      Eukras below notes explicitly why young women, and especially smaller young women, will HAVE this need for protection more than just "everyone":

      Perhaps a better example would be the obligation to treat younger women as sisters, and so, not be a creep around then, and to be attentive to the fears they have about the behaviour of men-in-general. That's a properly gendered moral concern that applies especially to men.

      Those who are smaller than others, and physically weaker than others, will always be more at risk from those who are larger and are bullies and exhibit more physical aggression. Males on average are larger and have just a slightly higher level of inclination toward physical aggression, but the top end the scale of aggression is inhabited almost entirely by males. Hence it falls to right-minded males to offset this natural cause of social discomfort for those who are smaller or weaker by overt compensating behavior.

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    2. thefederalistJanuary 4, 2026 at 9:24 AM

      I think a major thrust of all the specifics of gentlemanly behavior in the Western world - holding the door for ladies, walking on the street side, tipping the hat, etc. - was to train men to have an instinctive care for those around them who are weaker. Which women almost always are, and even she isn't in the specific instance it helps to maintain the training for the vast majority of occasions when she is.

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  9. AnonymousJanuary 2, 2026 at 5:19 AM

    Re:item #7
    I look at the final reward from the Pascalian perspective: The reward is eternal and I'm enjoying now.

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  10. AnonymousJanuary 2, 2026 at 10:17 AM

    It's true. I used to cuss and make sexual innuendoes when I was around women all the time. When I did, even though they often laughed, I felt so vulgar and I'm still quite ashamed of some of the things I said
    Thanks for the advice and for your blog.

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    1. AnonymousJanuary 2, 2026 at 1:18 PM

      I work in the intensive care unit of a hospital. We deal with pain, suffering and death. And we clean up bodily fluids. My co-workers, including a lot of females, curse a lot.

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  11. AnonymousJanuary 2, 2026 at 9:23 PM

    Your list of "masculine" virtues is fine, except that they all apply equally well to women.

    The article that inspired you, however, is performing a very different mission. It's not about masculine virtues, it's about excusing the evil and gross behavior of "young white men" – the racism, anti-semitism, Nazism, and fascism – by blaming it on progressive forces that have somehow conspired to "feminize" them.

    To fix them, it proposes various strategies of remasculization, like mentorship, restoring the manufacturing industries, and not being so sensitive about anti-semitism. I'm not quite sure how the last one works but it is mentioned quite explicitly and prominently – I guess because Jews are part of the feminizing forces.

    For me, the essential masculine virtue is *taking responsibility*. For yourself, for others when called to, for the state of the world around you. This article does the opposite – it absolves these Nazi shits from moral responsibility, choosing to blame their shittiness on others (feminists, Jews, DEI...you name it) who made them that way.



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    1. bmillerJanuary 3, 2026 at 7:36 AM

      The article doesn't excuse anti-Semitism, it just concludes that disallowing criticism of things like Israel's actions reinforces the critic's suspicions rather than dissuade them.

      Proscribing wrongthink about “international Jewry” makes the various conspiracy theories appear more plausible

      Why is it that people of the left think that everyone who does not agree with their dream of living in the Longhouse is a Nazi? Especially since the Nazis where fellow socialists.

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  12. EukrasJanuary 2, 2026 at 11:37 PM

    RE: 3. I'd say that these concerns (swearing, innuendo) appear in scripture with no gender differentiation attached. Which is largely true of the whole list, but it stands out more in this case. They're wrong for both men and women, and they're wrong in the company of both men and women. Perhaps a better example would be the obligation to treat younger women as sisters, and so, not be a creep around then, and to be attentive to the fears they have about the behaviour of men-in-general. That's a properly gendered moral concern that applies especially to men.

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    1. AnonymousJanuary 3, 2026 at 11:41 AM

      appear in scripture with no gender differentiation attached. Which is largely true of the whole list, but it stands out more in this case.

      I think that even though the admonition in scripture applies to both, it is typically males that are tend to be more prone to violating this. So there is greater need for men to be advised about it.

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  13. Sir LCLJanuary 3, 2026 at 6:48 PM

    I agree with all of your points. It is always a joy to hear your thoughts on any topic and I think you are one of the best, most formidable philosophers of mind in the current climate.

    Thank you ever so much, you have really helped me in my understanding of the most important subjects in life. You have been an excellent shepherd in that regard.

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  14. Vini TadeoJanuary 8, 2026 at 12:43 AM

    To all fellow men reading this.

    I know, you know, everybody knows that life is hard. We all know that living among others can sometimes be unbearable today. The apathy, rage, and disgust the world gives nowadays are very real.

    But remember wholeheartedly that GOD LOVES YOU. This world only exists because GOD DREAMED ABOUT YOU AND WISHED YOU. And it doens't really matter if you came through this world through sin because, even in that case, the Angels in heaven said on the day you were born, "What a happy sin!"

    Never be ashamed of being honest, chaste, and all, even if others put you down -- they are the real losers, not you. It's harder to be right than to fall into sin from time after time. So, at the end of the day, this is a kind of endurance proof. Remember what the Philosopher said: you become courageous by acting courageously -- and facing sin and our own faults necessitates courage.

    Do not despair of God's love -- do not commit the same mistake as Judas. Most of the time, we are lonely, fragile, and sins may try to invade our psyche, but remember to follow the example of Jesus. Be courageous. Do not be afraid to face the world because Jesus faced the world and won -- we must follow His steps, even if we are not divine like the Son of God.

    Do not think that you are "wasting your time" following a chaste life. Only blind and ideological people think that the world of flesh is more important than the inner realm of the spirit. They are slaves, but you are free. Remember, freedom is freedom from sinning, not freedom to sin.

    Remember the lessons told by our ancestors (like "Aristotle and Phyllis," even if it's just a moral history, and not a fact). Do not put yourself on your knees to something less than God. Only God Himself is your last goal -- all the other things in life will eventually waste away.

    Love and respect your mom and dad. Do not be resentful if, like me, you didn't grow up with a father. I have a very loving mom, and I feel gifted by God for having her. It was being raised by her through all the difficulties and all her extraordinary effort in life that made me the man I am today. I am very grateful for that. Not all lessons learn through life are happy; some are painful, but they are always worth -- and if I dare to say, they have an implicit happiness in them too. Also, if you want to be a father someday and you didn't grow up with one, be the father you think you deserved -- because your kid deserves a good father too.

    So, in all difficulties in life, whenever you feel abandoned and forgotten, remember that God will always be with you. It's hard. We do murmur. We do lose our temper. We do lose our hope. I know. But, at the end of the day, nothing in life is like one day after another. You will see that the monsters you face in life don't last forever, but you can rest assured that God does. So, do not be afraid of famine, poverty, bills, evil people, and all -- these things have a limited time in your life. Whenever you are facing one (or all) of these problems, remember your loved ones, the ones your fighint for, and never be afraid to fight. Even in the most disastrous situations in life, God is there to make your life flourish (remember: even in Auschwitz, there was the miracle of life happening).

    Remember your heroes. Remember Aristotle, Saint Paul, Saint Peter, and all other figures we had throughout history. Most of our heroes faced severe losses, sadness, hopelessness, and, even through all of that, they made something worth living for. Remember Fathers like Alfred Delp. Remember those who suffered and lost everything, because, at the end of the day, they died, labored, and worked so WE could have a better life. Honor their names and memories. By doing so, you are also, even if you are not thinking about it, being a hero just like them.

    God bless you all.

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    1. bmillerJanuary 8, 2026 at 11:22 AM

      Vini,

      Best comment I think I've ever seen here.
      God Bless.

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    2. Vini TadeoJanuary 9, 2026 at 1:58 PM

      bmiller,

      Thank you very much, glad you liked it!

      God bless you too, my brother. I wish you a blessed 2026!

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    3. TalmidJanuary 9, 2026 at 8:11 PM

      Truly awesome, Vini! Sometimes, this simple message is all one needs to remember.

      Deus lhe abençoe, meu garoto!

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    4. Vini TadeoJanuary 11, 2026 at 1:35 AM

      Hey, Talmid! Long time no see!

      I'm glad you liked it too, my fellow countryman!

      Btw, I still remember an important discussion we had on the blog (many posts ago) about our loved ones and the afterlife. I vividly remember that you said "que vejamos todos" (may we see all of them [in heaven]). This simple phrase has become a part of me, and whenever I pray the Rosary, it runs 'in the background' of my mind.

      As you aptly said, the simple messages -- the ones that come straight from the heart -- are all one needs to remember.

      Deus te abençoe sempre, meu querido!

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    5. TalmidJanuary 13, 2026 at 5:08 PM

      Long time indeed!

      That is nice to hear! Fortunately, i never lost a loved one, yet, so i admit that i can only imagine how it is like. It does feel very strange and sad to even think on never seeing someone close again. Sisters are living away, so not having their daily presence is already quite sad.

      And indeed, simple messages are the strongest ones.

      Amém! Que de nós o Senhor Amado sempre cuide!

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  15. EdralisJanuary 10, 2026 at 5:32 AM

    Two comments:
    First, as has already been pointed out by a few before me, these are rules that equally well apply to women (I wonder what your list of "basic principles of femininity" would be?).
    Second, I don't understand why the civility you exhort people to cultivate is bounded in such a way. I don't think incivility could ever be a good thing, even with those who have proven themselves uncivil and what you call "obstinately stubborn".
    I don't see how this is in line with the principle of turning the other cheek.
    On the contrary, it seems to me the more someone lashes out, the deeper we should reach into our resources of empathy and understanding, and the more generous we should be with our compassion.
    I don't see how insulting and speaking down to another person can ever be justified. We should, in my opinion, *always* remain respectful and never talk down to others - including (and perhaps especially) those with disagree with.

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